Friday, October 30, 2009

two books

I so want this book :

Ugly as Sin -

and this one:

Catholic Church Architecture and the Spirit of the Liturgy -

I love church architecture, but am particularly drawn to the old school style instead of the modern style. Anything built plainly and most things after 1960 kill me.

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

my view of teen dating

When I think of all the people I know who did date in high school, I can come up with only 2 or 3 couples who ended up with their high school "sweethearts". Most did not. And I remember the days of people pressuring you to have a boyfriend or to ask this guy or girl out. Really I was probably the odd one out, where there were one or 2 guys that I liked while in high school I didn't actually date them. The first and foremost reason being was that I wasn't allowed to date. I particularly remember my dad having to talk to the one guy that took me to a dance that my mom got very upset about it being date-like, and from then on out that boy never asked me out again. In some ways I was angry at my parents for doing that. But really I now can look back and see it was a good thing, because I have changed so much since then. To have gotten myself emotionally invested in a relationship would have probably limited my growing, at least for me. I had a lot to deal with prior to this due to unfortunate circumstances in an incident in my childhood, and really didnt come to grips with them till later. So probably having this rule for me kept me out of deeper trouble that I could have gotten myself into.
Then I went to college, and again some folks around me encouraged me to date. But in my mind now I knew that I wanted to be pursued. And not the other way around. So anything that came about never really materialized much. There was a summer incident in which I was taken advantage of, and really that scarred me for a while, but I got thru it. But really what got me thru it all and helped me to have a healthy view on it all was to see good examples around me. Examples of people dating with marriage in sight. With those committed to doing the best thing for the other person involved and him or herself so that they wouldn't be jaded and confused if it did end. I have to thank those people for helping me to see that there was a way that dating could be done right. I wouldn't have been able to grow into who I needed to be when God put in my path my now husband. Those people that I saw as good examples challenged me and listened to me and helped me to keep my higher standard. So when I met Keith and interacted with him and his friends, I knew what kind of guy I was looking for, one that wasn't gonna let me fall but build me up and make me into the woman that God wants me to be. Entering into a relationship with him it wasn't a casual thing, and he never took advantage of me, but really wanted what was best for me, and for this I thank him. I still thank him periodically for the fact that he was a major part of God's plan for helping me to see that I was ok, and to move forward away from the past destruction.
Maybe when it comes to teen dating I bring all that mess with me. I can't see it as good thing just to date someone without there being a bigger purpose there. I can't see the just wanting to date someone just to date someone to be a good thing. I don't think I would be me if I had this philosophy. I think if one does date you always have to think of what is best for the other person, and the best must be based of of Jesus's standard. If its gonna be something that is detrimental towards them it shouldn't happen in the first place. And it shouldn't be out of balance, as to forget all of your other relationships that you have. Your friends will really miss you if you leave them for a guy or girl, and it won't be the same when you come running back to them after being dumped.
For the few folks that I know that it worked that they actually ended married part way thru college after starting to date in high school, these guys are the anomaly and God definitely was working in them to keep them on the right path against the normal grain of what usually happens in high school and college. And for this I admire them. I do however think that a major factor of their success was the fact that both parties involved had strong relationships with God and probably was the basis for their meeting in the first place.
For the rest of people who aren't an anomalies in this, I really think that group dating and developing good friendships are the way to go. Also to focus on who God wants you to be rather than who society tells you to be is very important. Because if you focus on who God wants you to be, you can see clearer what your future vocation should be, whether it to be married, single or being a priest, nun, or brother somewhere. Forming strong friendships and learning how to interact with the opposite sex without being romantically attached help this out a lot. Because no matter where you are you are going to have to be authentically male or female in your vocation, and live out the relationship that Christ presents in the new testament, to love so much as to die for the other. And this will apply whether it be in marriage to a man or woman or to Christ through the church or as a single missionary in the world.
So to end, if a teenager reads this I say first, don't define yourself by who or if you are dating. And two keep your focus where it is supposed to be on God. If you are dating someone be sure that you treating them with the utmost respect and dignity that every person deserves so that both of you can keep your eyes focused on your savior. If you aren't dating someone, well to me that is awesome, because God is calling you to do something different at this time, whether it be to focus on how to achieve your goals, or to be able to be flexible to help somewhere or to think about where your relationship with God stands and maybe to think about your future vocation. No wallowing is needed when being single because this time is a gift given to you by God to be able to grow and be used for something greater.

I wonder how much of this I can use on Sunday. hmmm.

Friday, October 23, 2009

7 quick takes

1. I think that I actually posted on other days besides Friday in the past two weeks. I must have actually had time or something important to talk about to do so.

2. If you follow my rants on my gmail statuses, I mentioned that we opted out of the 20 week ultrasound for the baby llama. First of all, this year we have sucky insurance so it was probably going to have to be paid mainly by us for the procedure and since we just did a house transfer, we have little money in the bank to do so with. Second, a main reason people want that 20 week ultrasound is to find out gender, not something we were planning on doing. Lastly, the doctor or midwife wants you to have it because they can only abort up to 22 weeks in their system, so if there was anything they saw majorly wrong, then they would give you that option. So yes, really going old school back to the 80's on this one.

3. There is one more week before we have a house again. So there is at least one more week that we live in Brecksville with the in-laws. Honestly, it just makes me thankful for my own childhood, and that I had my mom as my mom instead of someone else. Because depsite all the crazy things that have happened in my family, I would say that I am better suited for their craziness then for someone else's. I appreciate all of the times my siblings helped me to be more respectful towards my parents and elders, and all the times they pushed me on to be a better person. I am thankful for my parents disciplining me in a manner that worked that didn't crush my spirit and strong will to do things. I am also thankful for their willingness to help me with things that were outside my capacity, or could have been done better and faster with their help. Really, it wasn't perfect, but I think I learned a sense of authority and respect for each person in my childhood and the importance of God in daily life, that I am not sure I would have turned out the same way if it had been different.

4. Since the vaccines, are not in yet at my midwife group's office, I am slightly paranoid about H1N1 flu since I don't want to end up in the hospital as a pregnant woman. I have started my paranoia thing of not touching door handles unless necessary and have started saying a Hail Mary prayer while washing hands. The prayer of course helps, and its the correct time that you need to actually be scrubbing your hands to get off germs. If you don't want to say a Hail Mary, you could think of another prayer of similar length or sing Happy Birthday, which is also the right length for scrubbing hands.

5. I have been on a knitting of hats kick. I knitted 4 hats so far. Two for my future baby back in late summer, and then 2 more recently this month, one for a friend's baby girl, and another for my niece. I hope they all fit ok. Anyway, I am supposed to be making a sweater next, but for some reason, I really haven't gotten out of the true hat kick yet.

6. I've started putting together my thesis. Which in someways, is a little scary, but at the same time, really needs to be done. Post in utero time for baby, time will be more limited.

7. I've had major overheating issues lately. It's just making me very thankful that I am pregnant in the winter and not in the summer, so if I need to cool off, I can just go outside and all will be ok.

Hope you guys have an excellent weekend. Enjoy pumpkins and fall leaves!

Thursday, October 22, 2009


Such a strange feeling it is to have someone kicking you from the inside of you. I am sure as the little one gets bigger this will become more uncomfortable, but for now it makes me smile. A simple and odd reminder of life. Most of the time I'm amazed that there is a little life with a little heart beat, with strong legs or arms inside me. It gives me a tiny glimpse of the amazing powers of God. The fact that he can create from something so small something with so much life. In this way I am thankful for the tiredness that is ensuing me right now, the one constant reminder that I am helping to form a little child along with God. :)

Thursday, October 15, 2009

move out day...random thoughts

1. Sad to be saying goodbye to 9785 Grist Mill, but happy to be moving to a place more fitted for my husband and I and baby and other future babies.

2. I am thankful for having a sleep-filled night, though I just wish that I didn't have non-sleeping night prior to make the tiredness still be here.

3. I took some Sudafed for congestion, as it seems that the congestion is major enough today to feel like its running down my throat. grr. Hopefully it will help a bit.

4. I am wondering if it would be fun to do a poll on whether or not folks think our baby due March 6th is gonna be a boy or a girl. Normally this week is the mark in which people find out, and since we don't want to I wonder if a poll would be fun. I think it would be something like Do you think its gonna be a Gracelyn or a Benjamin? I could totally add the strange middle names to it, but I think that keeping those a surprise for most people is kinda fun. Especially when we are thinking of putting a full name of a Saint of our choice as the middle name. Anyway let me know what you think about doing a poll. I'm leaning towards a yes, though I am wondering where would be the best place for it. Probably it will be Facebook since only a few read this.

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

life happens

One of the things I never thought would have happened happen on Friday. I lost my wedding ring set while on my public transit commute. It simply fell off my person and rolled away on the train car, maybe into another's possession maybe still stuck on a certain train. Who knows. I was devastated on Friday when I lost it, but am doing ok since then. I'm still sad that I lost it, and if anyone jokes about it I get a bit angry, but I know that with all the signs posted and the prayers being said, its in God's hands with St. Anthony helping. My husband is checking the pawn shops today, granted he is well enough to get out of bed, he is a bit under the weather, probably due to lack of sleep and abundant amounts of stress for him.

Honestly, one would think that the woman carrying the child would have all the stress, but really my husband has a lot on his plate. He has to work his normal job, do work for his side programming job, then finance our new cheaper home, figure out all the stuff that goes along with moving, figure out what is the best health care plan from his company for us next year, and then on top of this, he is focused on finding my lost ring set. So yeah, pray for him if you get a chance, probably for some help if you could. I am trying my best, but I tend to sleep a lot now and not have my normal energy so my helping is a bit on the limited side.

So we do have a house, pending inspection, and the contract says we are set to move in on the 23rd, which is pending also on how fast the loan goes through. Anyway, keep praying for that ring to be found, and if you have anything you need to be prayed for, let me know.